itinerary cut & paste from the website

7:45 pm -8:45 pm : The Unbreakable Popsicle Stick Gang [details]
From the people who brought you such past fringe smash hits as How I Learned To Drive, A Closer Walk With Jean Chretien, Nucklehead Fever, Bonnie Dangerously and Ice Cream comes a true story about Mom’s, Magic and Miracles. You’ll laugh…you’ll cry…but most of all…you’ll believe!!! PS. Come help One Crazy Frenchman celebrate 20 years @ the Fringe!

CLOSING PARTY: Sunday, Sept. 17th 8pm, Fringe Club.
Celebrate the closing of the Festival with, the Raffle Draw, the Scavenger Hunt results and the Georgia Straight’s Critic’s Choice Award, presented by the Straight’s own beloved and feared theatre critic, Colin Thomas.

11:00 pm -11:59 pm : The Excursionists [details]
England has sunk! Two English Gentleman, Lord Necksycracksy & Professor Goggins are sans country. Equipped with their whimsy, their wit, and their Britannic bravado, they set off on an adventure of aristocratic proportions. WARNING: This show is performed at a depth of 20,000 leagues. Contains strong themes of Imperialism and Victorian science fiction. May cause scurvy.

I want Edward Teach panties, so I can have pirate booty

The BodyWorlds Exhibit opens today at Scienceworld! (His website’s been updated, it’s nice now. Really).

I went with Alastair to see it when we were down in L.A. It’s beautiful and liberating in a way that’s difficult to describe. I wanted to cradle every body, kiss thier eyes and know thier names. I stared and I stared, I crept as close as they’ll let you to try and memorize every exquisite detail. The exhibition is full of moments of deep, abiding, and very surprising glory, where you find yourself suddenly enraptured with unexpected appreciation for things you’d never think you might see. The volunteer application sheets they have on-line require that all applicants have “Solid comprehension of moral issues regarding death and the displaying of human bodies.” I suspect I would fail the test, if there is one. I am brimming with admiration for what Von Hagen has done, I am delighted in respectful awe, but I doubt I have any idea what other people’s moral issues might be. Mine are unperturbed, only upset that there are not more of these shows, that it is not at least mandatory for school-children at the age of nine or ten.

Censearchip: exploring search engine result differences returned by different countries’ versions of the major search engines. (The Web and image search functions of four national versions of Google and Yahoo!: the United States, China, France, and Germany.)

Summer is over and I’m not sleeping well, though I should be alright. My Oliver-inspired Pirate day is getting posted around as it should be, {it’s come around back to me from three different sources today}, and people are saying they’ll come. (My man Crow: “I was almost an innocent man!”). Last night I was ship building. Stephen supplied all the construction materials, minus silly string and blue glitter, I made the body of the big one, then Michael came over and made me a mermaid and an anchor, and Ed helped make some brackets for the ropes. Cardboard boats with broomstick masts, it looks like the big one will fit three to five people and the little one will fit two or three. That way we’ll have a main ship and an attacker. I plan on simply chucking them off the balcony instead of wrestling them down the stairs when Tuesday comes. Should be fun.

Bush ‘Slush Fund’ possibly courtesy of the Canadian softwood lumber industry. (hell.)

I brought Sam two baby frogs in a fishbowl and a green mint cupcake for his birthday Monday and we curled up in a chair together and talked. It’s comforting to have him back in town, extra special to feel safe and warm while being given small stories from Burning Man. I’m glad he went. He said he didn’t miss me because I was everywhere he looked there. Funny how the man keeps me sane, like he’s a shadowy mirror of a relationship or a wish I made as a child on the dried out fluff of a dandelion.

ship building at my place this week

Don’t be the last kid on your block to know about the International Talk Like A Pirate Day Flashmob!

Arrr Sea Battle will be at Grandview Park on Commercial Drive! The time of attack will be 4:30!

Avast ye hearties, ’tis the day of piratanical reckoning this upcoming Tuesday, September 19th! In celebration of the scourge of the bonny ocean, ye scurvy curs are expected to stand proudly as pirates and brandish yer grimy cardboard swords for a battle of grate proportion.

Make yer own ship, parrot or wench to kidnap!

Bring booty and swag!

Remember, you are rogues! Privateers!

Don’t dance the hempen jig, but plunder in the park, hornswaggle the landlubbers and win the day!

GROG AND SHANTIES AFTER AT EL COCAL, SIX PEE EM.

please cross-post

nine months ago, some parents got it ON

pour des dents d’un blanc éclatant et saines (2005) stuffed birds play records by putting their bill into the groove by Jeroen Diepenmaat. thank you Larry.

Happy Birthday to Sam, David, Victoria, Jordan, and my un-cousin Darren today!

The Fountain, by the way, directed by Darren Aronofsky, (Pi, Requiem for a Dream), opens here as part of the Vancouver International Film Festival on Wednesday, October 11th. Tickets are only $9.50, so you have no excuse not to go. I will be attending even if I have to roll pennies off the street to pay for my ticket.

Head On, one part of a three-part installation by Cai Guo-Qiang commisioned by the Deutsche Bank Collection in Berlin, consists of 99 life-sized wolves made over a period of six months out of sheepskin, straw, and other such materials, crashing into a wall of glass. thank you Andrew.

Penn and Teller in Bullshit! take on PETA. thank you Vicky.

Today Ryan sent me a letter from work:

“I think that the word ‘Amputee’ should be amended to ‘Amputeer’ in the English language. Amputeer is a much better word. It implies the sort of person who would consider keeping there taxiderm’ed limb in an umbrella stand, and I fell that this is a behaviour that should be encouraged.”

I think he’s onto something. I miss my taxidermy. I haven’t done any work on it since I’ve been unemployed, feeling somehow like time spent polishing bones is time taken away from my job hunt, that pleasurable or relaxing activities aren’t productive ones and that until I find myself a reliable pay-cheque, I don’t deserve to affix wings onto mink.

People are just monkeys who worry. thank you Stephen.

would have posted this sooner if I’d known

from websnark:

Lea Hernandez Needs Our Help. Seriously.

Lea Hernandez, author and artist of the epic and wonderful Rumble Girls books, a former Transmetropolitan artist, as well as the former editor of Girlamatic, has suffered a terrible house fire. Her family is safe, though they lost some of their pets (two dogs and four cats). They have also lost an incredible number of the necessities of life and of Lea’s business. They have lost most of their clothes. They have lost shelter. They have lost almost all of their media collection. They do not yet know how much of Lea’s original art is gone.

Lea is an incredible person, a firebrand in comics (in Gail Simone’s words, which I agree with), possessed of an iron will and a kind heart. And right now she is in great need, both on her behalf and on behalf of her own family.

I am going to repost what Gail Simone posted, via The Beat, the Talkaboutcomics blog, and other places. We ask everyone who reads this be as generous as possible. Lea has meant a great deal to the webcomics world, the print comics world, the world of graphic novels, the world of art… you name it, she’s had an impact. Let’s show her how wide that impact is.”

barbarian girl, still with wrecked ankle


Originally uploaded by Foxtongue.

This link has everything needed to tell a story and I like it. (and this explains where it came from. thank you Duncan.)

I feel like dancing. I’ve got new super-perfect music playing, the Kaya Project, (yes, go get some), that’s erasing the unfortunate substance of yesterday’s job hunting. It was a slow Monday, the whole day drifting like early morning. It was taking forever to accomplish anything, the thick simple gravity of the world was holding time down. Clear but molasses. I was tooling away at my computer, able to judge for how long, aware of tasks finishing, but unable to grasp how many were left or still needed to be done. My heart felt too light, my head too hollow, like cases made of calcium and ivory, places for quiet telepaths to live in who didn’t need me to be complete.

Vancouver Zombiewalk 2006 CBC Footage.

When my eyes refuse to read advertisements anymore, I’ve been watching video I took of Chris Murdoch doing contact juggling and falling in love all over again with the wonder and awe that he engenders so easily in me. I need to rotate some the video and lighten it before I can share it. Fool with the gamma a little, tweak the curves. It’s magical and a little too dark. My camera can do a lot, but I expect miracles and lately the poor thing’s been flatscreen crashing.

Oh deary me, the things you find on Craiglist…

I really want custard and I don’t know why.

Last night I climbed onto the outside railing of a balcony and found on stage an attractively costumed man with painted eyes playing a banjo and crooning into a strange contraption that looked like a sci-fi prop black box had been caught molesting a trumpet.

Sometimes life is alright.

After him a girl in a black dress sang about the moon in New Orleans, holding her black curly head and complaining that she could hear people making love, then was a projector based shadow play with happy-face gelati spoons and a masked clown. The audience is entirely artists, strange clothes, odd conversations, a lot of raw talent. Beautiful Joanna stood in front of the velvet next and enchanted us while she played the guitar and sang everyone in love with her, and after her were women who started with thier feet on fire above thier heads, who became throaty chess-pieces in black and white hooped dresses who played matching clarinets.

Just another party at The Big Yellow House. I never feel as inadequate as I do when I visit.

How to remove Logos from your PDA / cell phone with sugar. found by lynchwalker.

Once again, I wanted to remind everyone that the fine establishment that is Sunday Tea tm is being held at my apartment this week.

Sunday Tea is a roving Vancouver tradition, an open-invite social event held weekly at different venues, generally from 11am-ish to 2pm-ish, depending on the hosts. Basically, if you’re reading this, you’re invited and so are all your muffins and your most fun friends. If you want to come but don’t know where I live, drop me a line and I’ll give you directions.

This time, it will also be a culture-jamming preparation day.

Here’s a quote from my roommate Graham: “This Monday will mark the five-year anniversary of September 11th; the day where a tragedy marked the beginning of the erosion of civil liberties throughout the Western world. I am organizing some humorous culture-jamming for the night of the 10th and the morning of the 11th to remind the world that not all demands for security are reasonable.

If you would like to participate, or are just curious, you should come to my house between 11 am and 2pm on the 10th. There, all will be explained.”

“You are welcome to invite other people if you think they’re reliable, interested and discreet (i.e. Zombie Militia, Rhino Party).”

He urges people to bring not only the usual trappings of Sunday Tea, which are tasty snacks and good people, but also tape.

good news is on the way

Graham‘s got a friend, Christie McRae, who has an Art Show Opening called ALTERNATE REALITIES tomorrow night at the Bump ‘N Grind Cafe at 916 Commercial Drive. He says be certain to be there, because there’s going to be a DJ and free shots of espresso. He really leaned on mentioning the espresso, so it must be tasty.

Also, Graham and I are hosting Sunday Tea tm this Sunday, so come visit, bitches. I have been cocooned, I need to see your scrubbed faces to remember you exist.

This week’s been full of music and strange adventure. Jon Bartlett lent me Mervyn Peake’s first book, for one, Lung and I went to a porn theater, (which was a far more unpleasant experience than we’d supposed), my mother sang with the Now Orchestra for the improv Metropolis soundtrack for Eye of Newt’s Silent In The Park series, I’ve installed an angel in my house, and begun a drawer of personal goods at Oliver’s. There’s more, but trying to remember everything is like trying to read text in a photograph damaged by salt.

So last we heard, our girl Friday is sitting outside a backpackers hostel, waiting for Esme to come rescue her from the appalling chance that one of her exes, who is now filthy homeless junkie upon the streets of Victoria, may come upon her and attempt to molest her person. American Brand Fear. She’s sitting with her book, appalled at how much she’s read already, and beginning to worry about her phonecall. She only had a moment, did she convey everything needed?

Olbermann’s Special Commentary Towards Bush.

Esme was only late because parking was hard to find. The cafe was nice, (though it’s the only place anyone’s tried to pick me up by telling me that they’re an astrologer), the music not terrible, (Nicholas was playing in a corner that was pretending to be a stage with two friendly middle-aged men), and the drink Esme bought me was delicious, a mixture of hot chocolate and chai I rather liked. It was a fund-raiser of some sort, likely for a cat. A good welcome easy to slide away from.

After we went to a velvety restaurant that floated Goldfrapp softly over a crowd of beautiful people, but it was too late in pretty little Victoria for food, all they had left was small plates of unsatisfying tapas, so we ended up in a second-rate late night chinese restaurant with comfortingly unidentifiable lumps of strange coloured food, the same you’d find in any Canadian town with a population over 1000. I don’t think we got home until two in the morning, full of grease and weak yellow tea.

OK GO doing the impressive treadmill dance live at the VMAS.

Nicholas’ house is a wonder. His “Mad Uncle” renovated it something like six times. Camouflaged to look like any other pebble and glass fronted house, it pretends to be middle-class and rather unassuming. Inside is another story entirely. Nicholas lives in the basement, a 1960’s style wood-paneled German porno bunker complete with secret passages. The walls glows with a shiny oppressive veneer that inspires me to start collecting vintage Playboy covers for us to varnish onto his ceiling and the only way to get upstairs without leaving the house is to go into the washroom and climb inside what, from the side, looks like a medicine cabinet. It actually opens into a tiny carpeted passageway lined with moldering vintage board games that lets out into the floor of the upstairs front hall closet. Upstairs looks fairly normal again, until you take into account the stripper pole in the bathroom and the occasional mad scientist electrical box. (Apparently they make scary ticking noises and, in the past, have genuinely blown up in proper mad scientist style even.)

and now it’s time to go to Eye of Newt



Originally uploaded by Foxtongue.

There is a boy asleep in my bed. He has dirty fingernails and one of the prettiest smiles in all the world. Kier, I’ve written about him before, called him an angel sitting by the side of the street. He had a purple hat then and spoke french to me. This time he was trying and failing to light a cigarette. Bandages on his face, knuckles scraped free of skin, he was sitting torn on someone’s front step. “How’re you?” “Terrible, you?” That smile, bruised, but like light. The matches were being blown out one by one by the wind. When I pulled out my lighter and lit it for him, our hands cupping the flame, I felt like I had stepped into the sort of film I found romantic as a child. Henry and June, Delicatessan, something with a heavy handed denial of pathos, quirky with a decent twist of Anias Nin.

It makes me uncomfortable that part of me finds him maddening, as if I could somehow swallow him whole as a muse, transform his flesh into shadow and stich it to my own, so I could be an artist too. I’ve never understood it and it has always made me wary. He’s one of the few people I can’t stare down. I’ve known him awhile now, but I see him rarely. Divinity is dangerous.

And speaking of disturbing things, this wins this week’s Most Awesome Video award. I’ve been passing it around on my messenger, so you may have already encountered it on your friend’ page, but if not, it’s well worth the momentary horror.

Also: Zombiewalk footage is now available, as are my Zombie photos.