questions that could save my life

josef astor
Originally uploaded by Foxtongue.

I am not a swan, to beat your body into a prone position
I am not disguised in feathers
white, downy, strong
by default a god

I fell and skinned my knees
a long time ago
someone picked me up
then hated me
it was a long long time ago

this program
wasn’t asked for
but created out of flesh

Tell me preacher,
explain and denigrate
tease forth the reasonings
of why I’m not allowed to like laughter
Show my holy things, your gasp
blasts apart the doors of the chapel
a thousand hymns that make and pray
to illustrate
my sins and stay
in spite of your eyes

hold silence to me
house these twisted skies
the laces in my skin are becoming tight
I fear my soul is leaping
no matter your hands
twisted together
or your knees
which sleep in a crowded cloth

You are not a swan
your wings are wax

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