Strangers in my own home are trying to buy my services…

I was sitting in the livingroom not fifteen minutes ago, re-reading All Tomorrows Parties and wiating to find out where the heck Bill went off to today when a man walked in. He’s an older fellow and had showed up a week or so ago, befuddled and in our livingroom. I’d say he’s prolly around 60? He seemed to be looking for previous tenants from a long time ago. Said he used to deliver the firewood for the neighborhood years ago. Harmless, and a bit not all there. I was downtstairs last time he had arrived, and rooomate Marshall had been reading in the livingroom. I cursed the heat for leaving the doors open and asked if he was looking for anything in particular. This time – for all I knew – I was alone in the house. So here I am, sitting with my book, and this man walks in. Again. Great. Just what I need. Practice on getting rid of people. Joy.

So I ask him what, if anything, he’s looking for, and he replies, “looking for you, actually. Your boy isn’t around, is he?”
I tell him that Marshall is not my boy, he’s my roomate and he’s currently upstairs, after all, that’s probably true. Then I add on a few polite, ‘so where will you be going? As you’ve obviously come to the wrong house again’ sort of remarks.
He asks what I’m doing today. I reply that I’m frightfully busy and if he’ll just excuse me and let me get back to my business- I’m cut off.
“How much do you charge?”
“pardon”
“How much for you to come with me?”
“I’m sorry – I seem to have misunderstood you, I’m busy today, and not going to go with you”
“Ï’ll give you $20 to come with me”
“No, sir, I’m really going to have to ask you to leave”
“Well, later then, when your boy isn’t home” and he goes to shake my hand.
I figure, okay – if it’ll get rid of you, shakey shakes then, and then he wouldn’t let go!

HE TRIED TO DRAG ME OUT OF THE HOUSE!!

Luckily! My ghods! He’s an old guy and it was easy to get my hand back!! So after that didn’t work, He said he hoped that I wasn’t mad at him, and he couldn’t perhaps offer me the $20 NEXT TIME!!

Scary scary scary

Then after a few more back and forths of, you’re very pretty, I’d like you to leave now – he finally gets outside, I close and lock the door, and get to watch him DRIVE AWAY. He had DRIVEN from whereever to here JUST to try and get me to go with him!!!

Aie! I an NOT leaving the front door open again for a VERY long time!!

Is anyone available to come over??
I’m feeling REALLY insecure right now….

It’s a meme kinda day

You are The Cheshire Cat
You are The Cheshire Cat

A huge grin constantly plastered upon your face,
you never cease to amuse. You are completely
confusing and contradictory to most everyone.

What Alice in Wonderland Character Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

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I don’t know this one

Wish
Wish

Which Nine Inch Nails Song Best Describes You?
brought to you by Quizilla

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meh – this is why I don’t watch TV.

My LiveJournal Sitcom
muffin and condom (CBS, 2:30): porphyre (Orlando Bloom) bites starsandgarters (Ed Asner). On the other side of town, egl (Gilbert Gottfried) hits on gothicbc (Kevin Bacon)’s co-worker. Afterwards, spaz_own_joo (Ethel Merman) causes problems at work when a file from alistaire (Chevy Chase) has a virus. Soon afterwards, gothphotography (Daniel Baldwin) eats dark_images (Salma Hayek)’s raspberry cheesecake. Also, gypsydemon (Crispin Glover) draws a picture on lxpk (Jerry Lewis)’s forehead. TV-PG.
What’s Your LiveJournal Sitcom? (by rfreebern)

——-

pizza makes everything better – though they left out taco pizza – my favorite

A pizza for porphyre:

Tomato Sauce, Mozzarella, Cheddar, Bell Peppers, Onions, Broccoli, Cauliflower, Mushrooms, Artichoke Hearts, Fresh Tomatoes, Arugula, Fresh Basil, Garlic Cloves, Garlic Chives, Sliced Hard-Boiled Eggs, Corn, Pepperoni, Bacon, Canadian Bacon, Sausage, Ground Beef, Chicken, Turkey, Clams, Shrimp, Basil, Oregano, Parsley, and a perfectly-baked crust.

Fun with pizza toppings at The Pizza Arbiter

Gave me Ice

In trying to find something completely different, I came upon this. It’s an old piece, but still interesting, I think. It stills brings everything about how I felt and where I was in life. I think I like it.

Wishing, wanting, waiting upon a tapestry of darkened stars
Watching the fire burn within each memory hidden not under non yet behind my brow seeing the past as clearly as the present waves of salt water tears that lap upon my minds shores A life explained away in fridge poetry Snaches of song, Tuppence of rhyme Being aware of the grinding thumping of this waterbeasts engine propelling me to my everycalled home Dwelling upon those known and maybe lost. HE TOOK MY BONES AND GAVE ME ICE then I ran away because he was leaving I ran away into what became solstice into what became my gifting he took my bones and gave me ice

Faerie Wings & Playland

Value Village has begun it’s halloweening! REJOICE!!

Stripey stockings are $6 and are all colours. (I got the purple ones). Knee high stripey socks too. (Knee highs come in black velvet as well as colourful stripes).
There are also beautiful fairy wings, (also purple), for $8.
I’m totally going to stock up.

I brought home Violet Stockings and a pair of wings.

Is it just me or are all the best bits of clothing available only when the shops are halloweening?

——-

Went to Playland yesterday with m’Love, the roomate, and two of the brothers. I wouldn’t bring the youngest. Horrid thing should be shot in the foot. No. Wait. Then he’d actually have something to complain about. Blah.

Anyhoo – unbelievable! $170 to getr us all in + four ride passes!!!
When did the prices jump? Last time I went, entry was $6 and a pass was $20, now it’s $10 and $40!! FORTY?? Berloody hell. (A scary moment – realizing just how many people looked as if this is just what they do on the weekend).

The rollarcoaster was wonderful as always. M’love had never been on one before, so it made it that much more special. *happywarmth* After that though, we made the mistake on going on a terrible ride. Everyone got quite ill after riding it – not enough speed to cancel out the carsick feeling. That took us out of commision for about an hour, but really, so did the lineups. (Including the one for the bathroom).

After that, we split up. Marchall with Cale to go see the Monster Trucks, Bill and I with Robin. We headed for the bumpercars, then gace Robin money to win toys with while we waited for the mad mouse. Talking in the lineups about the people that died on it when a car shot off the top of the track. Does anyone remember how long ago that was?

After leaving Robin to the numbing pleasures of the arcade, we sneaked off to the haunted house. I think we were a bit of a dissapointment to the actors inside. *grins* Wandering around placidly through crashes and bangs and people jumping out from the walls. We examined thier costumes while they tried to menace us. Poor things. *laughter* At one point we came upon a girl and her boy, afraid and lost, she was refusing to enter the pitchblack hallway. I took her by the waist and told her I wasn’t going to let go, just come along now, there’s nothing here but the dark, I’ve got you, and led her around the corner to light. I felt like a hero for two point five seconds.

My first haunted house… The hearses were pretty.

We met up after that, deciding to logride. Longest line-up so far. An hour we stood or tried to sit. Evil. If there were a gaurantee that the ride were to be as long as the wait, I would have gladly endured it, but as it was, it was the beginning of the end.

The swings were next, with Marshall hitting on any available female. Telling them that I was just a roomate and that my lover is 20 years older than me just to play thier disgusted reactions. Hah. Glad I caught him out on that one. Bill vaulted to fencing just in time to join us. Better than flying are the swings at the fair.

And that was it. Time was pressing, darkness had fallen, and it was the when to go. On the way out I bought M’Love a dragon. It’s a goofy little thing, but it commemorates the day in a way that ticket stubs can’t quite capture.

Went to Playland yesterday.

You are a Playful Date

Your dating philosophy?
“Fun first, romance later”
You rather scream on a roller coaster…
Then stare in to some guy’s eyes over dinner.

Guys to look for:
Men with humorous profiles and quirky interests
Sure that business suit guy may look boring…
But if he likes snowball fights, give him a try

Find the Love of Your Life
(and More Love Quizzes) at Your New Romance.

Van Island Vacation

Had a wonderful time away from this city. Arrived in Victoria on Sunday evening and wandered the roads. Tourists scurrying around us as we walked with our respective oddities. My purple hat causeing, not comment, but scorn and m’love with his guitar the same. Eventually we meandered to the theatre after a terrible dinner and sat in on the Grand Migration.

It was lovely. Inspiring. There’s so much of the world that I’ve never seen and perhaps never will. I want to visit all of it. Breathe the air on every continent. Meet the people and see thier worlds.

After the film, we walked in wonder. Too far along the water, then longer still along a road before we arrived at our temporary home. Our bags grew heavy, enough to cut. We were full of weary pain when we arrived, but having arrived, we felt better. My best friends bedroom, with her eternal bluerose comforter. I realized that a third of what was in there, was brought there by me. Presents from our decade apart and together.

We were idiots. We watched Howard the Duck. Don’t.

Sleeping in, rising late, our reasons for not seeing the dinosaurs. We bussed from Esquimalt into town, alighting at the swing bridge on the waterfront. Coffee, our first intention. After completing our mini quest, we set off, our caffiene choices in hand. We stopped in at a Bryans, and slithered me into a plum dress, then we left – our destination: The Iron Palace. Four floors of odd stuff. Basement shelves piled with occiloscopes and suits of armor, bouy bells, and typeset pieces. An interesting place. We took away sandals and a pattern for a duster coat.

Lunch was at a five dollar diner, with formica tabletops and all day breakfast.

From there we walked. Miles. Uphill. His grandmother pleased to see us. She brings to mind an old hyper cat. The type what has outlived thier flesh and is now left as too mych energy in a skinny little body. We looked at photos of thier family, and I took some. I suppose she’s my family too now, a granny-in-law. More film to be developed. A sweet woman, too bad I can’t recall her name.

We searched unsuccessfully for food, everything closes at five or six, and we attempted to feed ourselves at eight. Silly we, victoria is for kids! After a suitable amount of time went by to allow our stomach acids to eat at the lining, we sat and waited for friend Richie. For half an hour we sat, eyes peeled for a white van. When he arrived, it was a blessing. I’d never known what he looked like, and now I do.

We drove to Mishka’s place and packed our things into the van. A black tom tried doggedly to get locked into the house. I haven’t any idea what he came for, as he doesn’t belong to the house.

Dinner was at Alexsandros. The only big city restaraunt in the town. Wonderful food, and a trio playing bad 80’s as lounge music. Heavenly.

Here ends the first two day of vacation, from here, Victoria is left behind us. I am weary of staring at a screen, and so will leave the rest to tomorrow.

my hell?

Creationists
Circle I Limbo

Rednecks
Circle II Whirling in a Dark & Stormy Wind

Republicans
Circle III Mud, Rain, Cold, Hail & Snow

Democrats
Circle IV Rolling Weights

George Bush
Circle V Stuck in Mud, Mangled

River Styx

Bill Clinton
Circle VI Buried for Eternity

River Phlegyas

General asshats
Circle VII Burning Sands

NAMBLA Members
Circle IIX Immersed in Excrement

Racists
Circle IX Frozen in Ice

Design your own hell