gavin squared in the box again

The love has arrived. Out of the ether into the flesh. I was beginning to worry as I hadn’t heard of him for a few too many days and then today, the phone rang. My roomate knocking at my door, “The phone’s for you”. Everyone from last night had only just left, Alistair and Nicole trickling out the door only minutes before. It’s rather a surprise to find he’s in town. My mental map has to shift rather drastically, plans have to change and re-form. Emotional cross-hair amusement.

He threw pebbles at my window and I let him in. I expected somehow more of a welcome, but then it’s been established that I am a fool. Silly girl, such tricks are for the young. Perhaps when I’m older, I’ll have learnt an outlet. Desire won’t collect in my teeth, to gain pitch singing. As of now, the assuming creature has gone off to fetch food. We, the people who survived SinCity, cleaned me out a little last night. It’s again like any other day, ad infinitum. I breathe, I blink, I go on, I miss people I’ve never met.

I’m going to be posting more pictures today, mostly from the same set. The children kept me from properly creating any new ones. I’m thinking too that apparently I need to be alone for the rest of what I’m thinking. Expecting company tears me from my methodical click snap self. It’s a different kind of On.

I’m not your little toy eight

I didn’t even know he was coming.

I was going to write about the past few days. Watching a movie over at Jacques with Diane, how free that felt, how aware I suddenly was of my own age and theirs and how lit never matters with the right people. Hitting SinCity with Alistair, Javina, and Nicole and how we brought the fantastic Ross Nukem home to make camping food for us at four in the morning and how we all crashed together around dawn. Taking pictures and odd correspondences. How I’m continuing to be sick pissed off at myself for not having anything for the futuriority project. (That one especially.) But.. but…

I just got a phonecall.

Gavin’s in town.

I’m slightly… unprepared.
I wish I could have a chance to explain why.
My brain needs some sorting.