Happy birthday Jenn, we’re on our way.
Day: October 20, 2004
judge me not for I have yet to sin
I’ve been cleaning all day, (if anyone knows how to troubleshoot a lava lamp, I would be grateful for suggestions), with short visits of Alistair dropping things off. In a shocking display of unusual behaviour, I decided to actually eat the food I’d made earlier. Perogies & sour cream in the soothing light of my singing computer. In theory, a good idea, what with strummy pop on and some amusing media to pore through. Instead, I got distracted by a Jones Soda label on my desk. So! You! The Reader! I really don’t know why I bothered to do this, but I think it’s Your fault. Vote for me here.
This is utterly my fault and I am brimming with gladness.
How the hell did I get so domestic? My house is full of boxes. Mine and my roomates, AV Gear and Alistair things. Mix them all up and we would have a wierd studio covered in glitter. We could destroy the world from my messy box. Death-defying horror and strangeness. I like it. I want to unpack. Start with my room, then find homes for the lava-lamp, the lunchboxes full of glow-in-the-dark dinosour skeletons and concert tickets, the tibetan monk-made jewelry my ghodmother bought new in San Fransisco the year everyone looks back to, wishing they lived in Haight Ashbury. Nevermind the sewing patterns, the embroidered films, the dreams flying in a hundred odd objects.
Walk this damn line. Defy and dissolve whatever the hell it is we think we’re doing. I’ve got music cranked, I’ve got food started in my one last pot. Someone I barely know is moving in. Water boiling and I’m barefoot dancing with a shiny cleaver in hand. The ferret is scurrying everywhere, exploring the new topography of my apartment. You would love to see this. This is simple reality beating, burning skin deep. I’ve ascertained recently that this isn’t normal.
This is class.
My world has expanded to include other peoples inspiration. My friends have been infected back.
Take this paradise and shred it.
let it never stop
Life is doing it again.
Yesterday I wake up somehow entangled with a boy. Fifteen minutes after arriving home, a friend arrives crying. This continues until she’s better, she leaves when it’s dark. Hours have passed, but not minutes pass until I find out that Jon is dead. The phone rings as I feel myself dying. Then the ex arrives, who also cries. It is a long hard time.
I discover this morning that I have been beautifully painted by riotlounge who posted it here.
Today the boy is moving in.